Giggles from this afternoon.

Sven: Hey, do you think the neighbors heard us last night?
Nick: We were pretty loud, huh?
Sven: Maybe we ought to tone it down a little.
Nick: Fuck the neighbors. If I have to listen to them play Lady Antebellum, they can listen to me getting nailed.

*

Steph: I'll never know what it's like to be a man. And I don't want to.

Sven: No problem. Next time you have sex, just spray whoever you're doing in the face with one of those spray bottle thingies.

*

Steph: Geez, sorry I'm such a jackass.

Naz: Oh, babes, you're an asshole sometimes, but never a fucktard.

*

Sven: I like McDonald's nuggets in Russia better.

Me: They have McD's in Russia? And why not?

Sven: Because ours are made of chicken, and yours are made of... I don't know. Illegal immigrants. Or something.

*

Naz: You know, Sven and Nick, y'all always say how much you like fat chicks. It's probably because you don't have to fuck 'em.

*

Me: So then, I forgot if it was nPr or nCr.

Nick: NEVER FORGET OR THE TERRORISTS WIN!

*

Nick: I love him. *points to sexy black male model*

Sven: He looks like he talks too much.

*

Naz: You should just sneak up on her and jump her. Remember, it's not rape if you yell, "SURPRISE!"

*

Nick: Steph, I don't know how people read your handwriting.

Naz: They probably don't; they just think some Arab was really angry.

*
Sven: All lions are males
Steph: Where do baby lions come from then?
Sven: Then what are tigers?
Steph: Stripey
Sven: No, there's no such thing as a female lion. Thats why they call them the King of the jungle. Not the Queen of the jungle.

*

Steph: I want a tattoo.

Naz: I don’t like coloured tattoos. If you want a coloured tattoo, just get it done in black outlines and then you can colour it in with markers every day. That way you don’t have to worry about it fading.

*

Sven: I miss Michael Jackson.

Steph: Let me tell you my Michael Jackson story! This one time, I listened to a Michael Jackson album but I don’t remember which one now he is dead I am sad. The End!

*

Naz: Dolly Parton sure loved getting her tits out. Can't say I blame her.
Steph: Remember, it was the 80's. She was probably high the whole time.
Naz: I don't need to be high to get my tits out. I'm just high on the fact I have such awesome tits!

*

Naz: Look, a rainbow! That means people are having gay sex. Hope it’s two hot chicks.

*

Naz: *eats nuggets*

Me: I love watching you eat. You’re so cute. Like a monkey playing with Lego.