--rainbow boy, rainbow road.

I wanna kiss you.

But if I do, then I might miss you, babe.

-

I'm gonna do it tomorrow. :)

Something for you to remember me by.

.

I'm gonna miss you, very much, chubby boy.

You've been part of my life for eight years.

I don't get why it has to stop now.

Two words;

don't go.

--if they knew what I've become.

you make me better,

you give me pleaure,

it's just your effect on me;

you've taught me a lesson,

now I'm behaving,

must be what's best for me,

you make me sweeter,

you give me fever,

I'm a believer.

...

do you feel super,

I'm the new girl curled around your finger,

I've taken your potion,

and now I'm senseless,

defenseless,

a fool;

the spell I'm under is you,

it's you.

...

you're just what's come over me,

you're what's gotten into me,

you're who did this thing to me,

I used to be so bad,

but you,

you make me better,

you give me pleasure,

must be whats best for me,

you make me sweeter,

you give me fever,

I'm a believer;

a true believer.

*

Extremely kinky, yes, I know, but I'm loving Dragonette (whoops, almost typed in Soho Dolls there) here. :)

Oh, oh, oh, and today!

Sarosh and I went to ask Meena if she's taller than him, and you know what?

She isn't.

Suck that, Sarosh. :)

You can't be scared of her anymore!

(Granted, she looked at us like we were completefuckingly insane, but it takes some getting used to).

On a lighter note, Stafanie Gee and I have almost finished our English short story thingy.

YAY FOR US.

Okay, sleepy now, and done with my MDM.

More later, or follow me on twitter. :)

.

Oh, and by the way?

Floppy is extremefuckingly cute.

And, and, and.

Sarosh, don't be mad, I give you permission to blog about me in return. :)

--letter to my partner.

Dear Stefanie Gee,

I apologize for this abrupt letter, but it needs to be said, once and for all.

I am NOT wearing a dress for our presentation in front of the whole class. For one thing, it obstructs me getting to class quickly, and for another thing, I will not have anywhere to place my personal belongings, i.e., wallet, phone, etc.

Please understand.

Your partner,
Stephanie Fernandez.
:)

--gagaoohlala.

F U C K I N G

E P I C.

--i tell you what i'd do.

I miss you, lady. :(

Elena: Amelie, what the fuck is this thing?

Amelie: Um... Just take it and you can teach your kids Geography later.
Elena: Okay, okay...

---

"...walking the miles, singing the blues,

learning to love what god gives to you ,

f he gave me rockets on the bottom of my shoes,

I tell you what I'd do;

I'd burn my sole where the sun was new,

and find the way,

the way to you..."

- Brandi Carlile; The Way to You

--vday.

Uh, yeah.

There's nothing much to say, really.

Missing my fellow CIMP-ians.

Keith, Sabrina, Sarosh, Ravi, Helen, Aina, Mel, Hanisah.

I bet Aina's missing Abdullah, no? :)

(sorry, Aina)

Uhmm.

mygodfuck, I miss Chewable so much.

Anyway.

Have an awesome one.

And appreciate your loved ones.

I'm busy appreciating Amelie Simone Mauresmo.

And a couple of others.

But I love y'all, too. :)

Happy Panty-Absence Day!

(refer to newspapers)

--movie night.

Stephanie-Jo Fernandez.

Haz a happee.

And an eated brain.

--i'll tell all my friends. :)

And oh, we’ll dance around it all night,

And then I’ll follow you outside,

And try to open up my mouth,

And nothing comes out right.

(sounds so familiar, okay).

*

We’ll fall disgustingly fast,

And we’ll stop hanging out with friends,

And they’ll be so offended.

*

And I wanna fall in love with you again,

I don’t have to try;

It’s so easy,

Who needs to pretend?

But because it’s so funny,

Let’s just think about it, honey,

Let’s just fall in love again.

*

Just my random, favorite bits. :) Had this in my head the whole day. Ask Aina.

--negeri sembilan; malacca; johor.

Some pictures from our trip, because I just got them, even though it was in late December. :) Sorry. And not to worry, there's many more to come, but bear with me now; it's late and I'm a college student.

Mom, Jermaine, me, aunty Reggie, Big, Uncle Christy and Uncle Jayaraj outside my grandpa's (mommy's dad) old school.

Daddy, mommy and me outside my grandpa's (daddy's dad) old house, where daddy grew up. Silly man wants to buy it again.

The second and third Fernandez generation outside the first generation's old house.

Daddy, aunty Reggie and me with the lady who helped birth them. I was like, "Omgwow." So jakun, I tell you.

And that's my grandpa's old clinic. Yes, the grandpa who was daddy's dad and who loved me very much. I was his favorite, okay.

--honey, I swear.

Because I haven't been showing Brandi Carlile much love, lately.

So, yeah, here goes. :)

...

"...it took a lot of missing you to see the truth..."

---

"...it's not about hanging on; it's making my deal with God..."

---

"...follow your heart and see where it might take you..."

---

"...to find me a place where the bridge doesn't burn..."

(this is the first-ever Brandi song I heard; I was 12).

---

"...I know that there might come a day
where my life is through
But I just want to be closer to you..."

---

"...This love branches out like an oak tree
Reach for the sky and roots to the sea..."

(which inspired the tattoo I'm getting on my back)

---

"...And how could you just disappear
And when did you stop
Missing me..."

(this one sounds like she's saying "Amelie" in the chorus)

---

"...I got tired of you; what's a girl to do?"

---

"...And I think the world of myself
But the world doesn't think much of me..."

(the first time I heard this, I was like, "This song was fucking written for me.")

---

"...I promise there's a downside; something you can't see..."

---

"...When you need a friend
You could count on anyone
But you know I'll defend
The tragedy that we knew as
The end..."

---

"...I would darken my windows so I can fall asleep
While the critics frown down on the hours
I keep that leave me
Dreaming, dreaming, dreaming
Your real world away..."

(brilliant take on sleep; I dare you to disagree)

---

"...You see the smile that 's on my mouth
It's hiding the words that don't come out..."

---

"...Then just when we believed we could be great;

Reality it permeates..."

---

"...If you only knew my mind was full of razors..."

(Nick heard this as, "full of raisins")

---

"...And so I hate that your overrated;

Most revered and celebrated,

Cause you're wasted..."

---

"...I have seen your nine to fives
Wash away your dreams..."

---

"...Oh but still, if you were gonna crucify me
I wouldn't want nobody to see..."

---

"...The path of least resistance
Is catching up with me again today..."

---

"...My one and only wrecking ball
And you're crashing through my walls..."

(I know this is super-greedy, but I want this tattooed, as well)

---

"...And now I'm lost in a sea of sunken dreams
While the sound of drunken screams..."

(see how she rotates the s and the d? It's amazing)

---

"...They are nothing like you thought
You can't be something you are not
Life is not a looking glass..."

---

"...And now, in my dreams
I can feel the weight
I coul just come clean
Keep it to yourself
I know what it means
I can't have you
But I have dreams..."

(This song is about sex-dreams; Bradi said it XD)

---

"...But I missed you and your antics..."

(Makes me think of Randy, for some reason)

---

"...Because you are still the only thing
That constantly amazes me
I love the road and I've been blessed
But I love you best..."

(This is cute, especially since she wrote it for her little neice)

---

"...Say you'll wait, say you won't
Say you love me, say you don't
I can make my own mistakes
Let it bend before it breaks..."

and

"...I'm alright, don't I always seem to be
Aren't I swinging on the stars
Don't I wear 'em on my sleeves..."

---

"...It's been time to let you go a thousand times
To never know that it hurts to be the one that you'd regret
I have to say that I am proud to know you
And I'll never be the same because we met..."

---

"...I'm singing out of tune
If there was no you..."

(One word: NICK.)

---

"...Curse these shackles that you put on me
And blessed be the day that you set me free..."

(This is exactly how Helen and I feel in relationships, and Brandi, too)

---

"...It's only you that my heart desires
Only you alone can break my fall
I pace the floor and I wish for more
While you were dreamin' with your paper dolls..."

(CHEWABLE.)

---

"...I'm so angry it's so sad..."

---

"...Cause I don’t want to be the sober one,

And I don’t want to be your only one,

I don’t want to be alone tonight,

Is this alright..."

(The nut who always nags me about drinking)

---

"...Hey, well I know you’re worried,

About what you’re gonna say..."

---

"...Nothing short of miracles,

Can save a small and dying world..."

---

"...maybe on some other day I'll find my way..."

---

"...I want to scratch my eyes out of my head,

Because I'm tired and I'm broken,

So can I spend the rest of my life in bed?

They say that pain can set you free

Well I guess we'll see..."

---

"...solitary sense it finally comes over me,

I made it through another week,

I know just where I want to be..."

(after another week of college...)

---

"...but thoughts of you could give me smile lines,

I laughed myself to sleep because I knew..."

---

"...I gave you the moon and the stars to keep,

but you gave them back to me..."

---

"...so I was happier pretending,

until the shadows hide your face,

and I can barely make a sound..."

---

"...Maybe we can meet again,

On the avenue of second starts,

And we have to fall in love,

Because we both have broken hearts..."

(I just want to kill her for this; too fucking cute!)

---

"...one magic kiss and a soft little song,

sleepy head eyes and a great big yawn,

or two,

good night,

I love you..."

(This one can make my 5"9' daddy tear up)

---

"...But I don't need you,

And I don't want you here tonight,

I just wanna know that I will wake up

confident my head is screwed on tight..."

---

"...We can pretend we live,

In a world that forgives..."

(NEW ONE! *happydance)

---

"...I'll take my wings with a heart that's true,

and find the way to you..."

(Again, a new one. *happydance*)

---

"...honey, I swear, your love is my repair..."

(My latest favorite).

---

Um, yeah. Basically, all I wanted to say is that Brandi's a genius and I love her a lot. :)

--i can't explain in any other way.

I need to bold,

Need to jump in the cold water,

Need to grow older with a girl like you,

Finally see you were naturally

The one to make it so easy,

When you show me the truth,

I'd rather be with you,

Say you want the same thing too,

Say you feel the way I do.

I love Joshua Radin for coming up with that.

--now I remember.

I know absolutely nothing about tennis, this season.

But I do know this.

Rafael Nadal Parera, I fucking love you. :)

Oh, right.

This is why I watch tennis.