Bleeding Love

Bleeding Love

Closed off from love,
I didn't need the pain,
Once or twice was enough,
And it was all in vain,
Time starts to pass,
Before you know it you're frozen.
This week was okay. We're all pundeks (Pundek means pussy in Tamil, I think) in class. It's kinda fun. Firstly, HAPPY SIXTEENTH, CARIN. God bless and keep you safe from the evil Ruindra/Celeste/Husaini's of the world. Went to Carin's house yesterday. Helen's mom picked us up with her totally ADORABLE little sister, Hannah. Passing by the security guard, Helen's mom got pissed with him and it was really, really funny. Helen, your mom is awesomely, insanely cool. We found Carin's house after a bit and her house is seriously nice, and her dog is cute, even if it's a little scary. Si Yng and Yee Ling were the second to arrive, followed by Amelia, Christine, Siew Huey and Shi Sian. Shasha was the last to arrive, and we should've made her sing... Camwhored like fahkk and I'll post the pictures sooner of later. Probably later, knowing me. I had to leave early, cause of ensemble practise. Sorry, Helen.
But something happened,
For the very first time with you,
My heart melts into the ground,
Found something true,
And everyone's looking round,
Thinking I'm going crazy.
This verse if kinda true. I mean, I'm deeply in love with Amelie Simone Mauresmo and everyone looks at me like, "What the hell?? Amelie Mauresmo? Is she crazy???" I don't know what it is, but there's just something about her... You know how it is. I swear, if I don't end up eing famous with Dirtnote (my band) or by playing the violin, I'm going to go like the guy in the movie My Date With Drew, where he finally, FINALLY got himself a date with Drew Barrymore. Mine would probably be called "Ohmigod, AMELIE!!!". Naz told me what would happen if I probably met Amelie and how it'd happen, as did Sulekha. They both had very different versions, but I'll tell Naz's first, cause it's funnier. Also, it makes me look better and we all know how much I like to be portrayed as the most gorgeous thing on the face of the earth. NOW I know why Leann dates Naz. It's all starting to make sense to me now.
But I don't care what they say,
I'm in love with you,
They try to pull me away,
But they don't know the truth,
My heart's crippled by the vein,
That I keep on closing,
You cut me open and I...
NAZ: So, one day, you'll be on the Ellen DeGeneres show with Leann and Nick because Dirtnote just won a Grammy award for best breakthrough band and Ellen asks you about why you wrote The Amelie Mauresmo song. You answer that Nickolai should take this question and Nick says that he doesn't approve of your crush on Amelie because she is, because he thinks she is indeed more manlier than him.
ME: And the Ellen DeGeneres audience throw rotten tomatoes at him and it makes the headlines?
NAZ: Uh, no. Let me continue, Steph. Then you go over to Ellen and Portia's for dinner, since all the Hollywood GLBT people hang out together, anyway. Everyone's there; cause it's a pool party, but as usual, you're no fun because you insist on wearing surf shorts and not a bikini like any normal person. As you're spying on Nickolai, who's totally flirting with TR Knight, Ellen yells at you to go over and help with the barbeque, so you do. You're carrying out some stuff with the help of Michelle Rodriguez when Michelle trips and one end of the table you're carrying goes flying and it knocks someone on the head. You look under the table and go, "Ho-LY SHIT!" because the person who just got hit by the table is Amelie Mauresmo.
ME: IS SHE HURT???
NAZ: Chill... You start stammering apologies to her, even though it's not your fault. Amelie looks up at you and gasps, probably because your arms are so magnificent. Did I mention that you're wearing that gray tee which makes your abs and arms look good? Instantly, you say something stupid, like "I love you, but I hate Svetlana Kuznetsova." or "Are you looking for a girlfriend?" and Amelie replies, "You do know Svetlana Kuznetsova's my Women's Doubles partner, don't you?" in that French accent and you just about die.
ME: *drools*
NAZ: Ew. So, after that, you're sitting by the pool right after pushing Kristanna Loken in, and you're all wet and laughing and Ellen DeGeneres calls you over. You go over to where she's standing with her arm around Portia DeRossi's waist and she says that she has someone she wants you to meet. Amelie's standing there, in a-
ME: Bikini, showing off her abs!
NAZ: Uh, sure. And she smiles at you, making you lose control of your brain cells. You smile back and flex your forearms, because I know that's your reflex when you're nervous or mad, and currently, you're very nervous. Amelie says hi to you, and you say, "Hi, I'm the table girl, uh, well, technically, I wasn't the one who KO'd you, but I'm really sorry and I-". Amelie laughs and tells you that you're funny and to stop blurting things out.
Keep bleeding,
Keep, keep bleeding love,
I keep bleeding,
I keep, keep bleeding love,
Keep bleeding,
Keep, keep bleeding love,
You cut me open.
Here Naz pauses to eat a handful of fries and take a gulp of Coke.
NAZ: Okay, where were we?
ME: When Amelie told me to stop blurting things out.
NAZ: Right. So surprisingly, after that, Wimbledon's going on and Amelie happens to be in the finals against Maria Sharapova, so she's got to get back to England ASAP, but the next day, when you're at home, swearing the house down because you fucked up your chances with the one and only Amelie Mauresmo, the doorbell rings. You open the door with a Kershaw, because since you became famous, all the manic lesbians of the world are on your case. It's a delivery van and the guy asks you to sign for something, but he won't tell you what it is.
ME: It it Amelie??? In, like, a wrapper and ribbon and nothing else? IS IT???
NAZ: Sorry, no. It's a Capuchin monkey, sent to you from England. You wonder who you know from England and come to the conclusion that it's Mz Fontaine, which is a little scary. Later that evening, Amelie's won Wimbledon and she's being interviewed by some TV guy. The guy asks her what's the most romantic thing she's ever done for someone and she says, "I just sent the person I love a Capuchin monkey today." You faint.
ME: *squeals*
NAZ: Ohmigod, you just squealed like a girl! One you come to, you fly out to Switzerland, where Amelie is. You grin at her and say, "Can I touch your abs?" She agrees and the two of you live happily ever after with her dog, your dog and your three kids.
Trying hard not to hear,
But they talk so loud,
Their piercing sounds fill my ears,
Try to fill me with doubt,
Yet I know that the goal,
Is to keep me from falling.
Ah, I love Naz. My other lawyer, apart from Yow Tzen, when he randomly yelled that he was my lawyer last year. Sunday School today was very, very interesting. Sulekha didn't come (screw you, bitch!) so I sat with Bianca and told her tales of Pn. Tan in English class, which she found rather funny, I guess. Then our teacher, this really weird woman called Cecelia made us switch places and paired all the girls up with boys. I GOT MAISON TAN! God, he's so funny. We made comments practically all through class, some stuff about Rebecca dropping Jacob and religion and things like that. After Sunday School, on the way to our car, dad stopped to tell Sr. Jane that we wouldn't be attending class on the 2nd of February and Sr. Jane told me to tell Cecelia. I caught her just in time and managed to explain that I wouldn't be attending class then. She nodded and said it was okay, then slapped me on my ass.
But nothing's greater,
Than the rush that comes with your embrace,
And in this world of loneliness,
I see your face,
Yet everyone around me,
Thinks that I'm going crazy,
Maybe, maybe.
Leann and Carmen sabo'd Naz, Eva and me yesterday morning. We were sitting outside doing sits-ups, push-ups and trying out chin-ups, and suddenly the hose comes on and we're soaking wet. Eva's braids got REALLY screwed up and the three of us chased them around the house and up the stairs, and when we caught them, no mercy was shown. Carmen's really intense. She’s Carmen; the loud Latin girl (whom I love very much) who always stands up for herself and her friends and what she believes in and had the greatest ass of any of us. She's amazing fun, especially after what she said about my abs yesterday. *sigh* I'm developing abs. Every other girl wants boobs, but I want abs, which is SO me. And unlike boobs, which grow when they want to, abs come as you work out, which makes them better than boobs. Boobs just get in the way, anyhow. Annoying shit. I don't get why everyone's so damn obsessed with boobs.
But I don't care what they say,
I'm in love with you,
They try to pull me away,
But they don't know the truth,
My heart's crippled by the vein,
That I keep on closing,
You cut me open and I...
Had time to kill with Eva and Carmen today and camwhored like crazy. Eva had this whole snazzy-hat thing going on today and I totally stole it to wear to Rachael's 18th, which is next week. I'm supposed to go see Mel later. If everything works out like it should, I'll be going to Rachael's with Mel and Eva's gonna be going with Carmen. If it doesn't, Eva can take one of her randon chicas and I'll take Carmen. Mom totally trusts Carmen, which is a little prejudiced, if you ask me, so wherever she goes, I get to go, because Carmen, being the amazingly GOOD and talented person that she is with all the moral values intact surely doesn't drink... *smirks* Well, we'll see about that, shall we? Not forgetting the time she didn't drink the champagne at the pre-party, but chose to splash it in my face instead.
And it's draining all of me,
They find it hard to believe,
I'll be wearing these scars,
For everyone to see.
Quick note here. I'm using this song because I heard it this one time on MTV. It's by Leona Lewis, who won X-Factor in England. It's the only R&B song I can stand to listen to at the moment and I also happen to think that the lyrics are superb. I was singing it all last night at Absolute and at violin class, and this morning at Sunday School.Everyone should listen to it. I'm looking for her album. Trust me, it's that good. Plus, the lyrics make me think of Amelie. Don't ask me why they do, they just do. And that's that.
I don't care what they say,
I'm in love with you,
They try to pull me away,
But they don't know the truth,
My heart's crippled by the vein,
That I keep on closing,
You cut me open and I...
Anyway, I've got to go put on a shirt and a pair of nice pants since I'm seeing Mel later and I wanna make a somewhat decent impression so that I can get a couple of answers to my questions to help me along with my decision. Part of me doesn't wanna leave home in case what I'm dreading happens, but whatever happens, happens for a reason, so I'll take whatever comes. Plus, no matter what, there's always DJ Sugar. More updates when I get back.
Keep bleeding,
Keep, keep bleeding love,
I keep bleeding,
I keep, keep bleeding love,
Keep bleeding,
Keep, keep bleeding love,
You cut me open and I,
Keep bleeding,
Keep, keep bleeding love.

Bleeding love,
xxSteph